Tuesday, June 06, 2006

060606 - Primary Day

I'm settin' here, biting my friggin' nails off, as to whose gonna win this thing. Geez-louise, gotta wait to late tonight to find out.

On the R side, we got all the smarty-pants pundits predicting a Pombo landslide. Oh wells, they are probably right, though it sure would be sumthin if that old geezer Pete was able to beat Mr. "I am one ethical sunofabitch" Pombo. It would prove that sometimes things go right in this crazy world and that maybe there is a God after all.

But nah, I sure ain't expectin nuttin like dat.

(Why I am talking like Rocky here? Maybe because I just spent a week back on the east coast. Anyways, to continue this here exposition.)

On the D side, we sure have a rock-em, sock-em match going on. After all those blog postings and rhetoric and whatnot about the race, from Rocky, Ricky, Anonymous 1, 2, 3, and 4, not to mention 2 cents and the Inner Circle -- hey, let's face it, there's a lot ridin' on this one. Feels like the clash of civilizations, 'cept it ain't no computer game. This here's the real world, and whoever the winner of this is, he's got his work cut out for him and a major uphill, "climbing Everest"-type challenge.

So I think the best thing, apres the primary, is to go drink margaritas with the loser and say "youse still a champ in my book" -- you know, soothe the weary and all that. But next step, whether youse are Ricky, Rocky, Anon, or the Inner Circle -- we got to go to bat for the winner, even if it is Steve Filson. Now, I ain't saying I prefer one over the other, but you can read what youse want into that last statement.

Bottom line in all this -- get your arses out their and vote, 'cept if you favor Pombo, then just stay home. He's got enough votes, he don't need yours.

Here's to Democracy!! See you all at the victory parties.


Anonymous Rocky Balboa said...

Yo Mr VPO.

Rocky here. I just wanna say dat speech of yers ain't bad fer a friggin amateur. Rocky detect you ain't from Philly, but hey Mr VPO you is OK in Rocky's book even if you didn't cram lotsa cheezesteak hoagies in yer trap growin up like me.

Maybe you wuz duh guy sittin around in Massachusetts in yer underwear?

Anyways, all dis talk about fightin and boxin has cuzzed Rocky to make a big decision, and I gotta say in part it's cuz of duh Fightin Repug. I mean dis guy is a friggin inspiration fer Chrissake.

So I'm gonna announce it to all youse guys here in duh Inner Circle first: Rocky is comin out of retirement and headed back to duh ring. If a friggin old geezer can get back into shape and reincarnate duh dance of duh friggin butterflies, so can Rocky.

Rocky announcin the new movie Rocky 7 to open Nov 7, starrin Yers Truly against ButtaPombO. Since Rocky don't tink duh Fightin Repug is gonna take him out in Round 1, Rocky goin fer a knockout in Round 2. You guys wit me in dis fight? Yo Rickey - dat invitation extends to you too, now dat dis blot has smartened you up a bit.

But den it ain't over til the friggin fat lady starts singin, or goin on a diet, or sumtin like dat. Cuz Rocky remember dem 1969 Miracle Mets, and dat shows anyting can happen.

Rocky out. Pretty Boy out. Fightin Repug out. Thomas Out. BeanO out. McNerney in. $.02 in. Delta in. Gibby Boy still rantin and ravin. I dunno about duh rest of youse guys...

9:39 AM, June 06, 2006  
Blogger VPO said...

Yo, gotta set the record straight up, and stuff, like hows you drink vodka, if you know what I mean.

This heres to Wayne "Head up Pombo's Butt" Johnson -- and by the way, this here's a family blog, but what is with all the dicks and johnson over on the Pombo side anyway? You got Big Dick Cheney and Little Dick Pombo and their manager is "johnson"? Makes you wunder what the Marlboro Man's been "marlboro-ing", if ya catch my drift, seeing as he's been spending all those nights in DC alone, not far from Barney Frank, Jeff Gannon, and DuPont Circle. I know there ain't know sheep in DC, so Pombo's got to do something.

OK, sorry about that, just trying to lighten things up, youse all gotta laugh sometimes. Ha, ha -- now, back to family values:

What wuz I saying? Oh yeah, this here Wayne the Wonger is saying we all are sitting around in our underwear in Massachusetts. Now, I just was in Massachusetts, and I didn't see nobody sitting around in their underwear nowheres. Not that I wouldn't a minded seeing some of those hot Irish college girls sitting around in their underwears, but they wouldn't let me anywheres near the girls dorm. Oh well, too bad, nuttin like a girl that's both smart and hot.

Goddam, I keep forgettin this here's a FAMILY blog. So back on track, I got this to say to Wayne the Whacker -- listen, you freak, there ain't nobody sitting around making shit up about your homeboy, esp. not in their underwears, and esp. not in Massachusetts. I been to Massachusetts (as I said earlier today) and nobody was in their underwear writing on this here blog. Maybe that was Annette sitting around like that, and Wayne just trying to tell Pombo it was Massachusetts and not Tracy, to let himself off the hook, if you know what I mean, with the Marlboro Dork off in DC most of the time.

Someone slap me upside the head - this is a FAMILY friggin blog for chrissakes!

Well, let me say this to Wayne the Wonking freakazoid -- I was just in Massachusetts, and the only thing I saw was the Mashpee tribe trying to fork over more dough to your homeboy so as they could get their friggin casino built. All those Indian guys over there, they got "casino envy" - with the Mashatucket Pequots making such a friggin boatload of cash and the Mohegan Sun shining so damn bright. What do you expect, of course the Mashpees want in on that racket. That is what is in Massachusetts, and I don't think they are sitting around in their underwear. There those Mashpees, but also that tribe in Long Island forking over dough to Pombo, trying to get a casino there also -- what is their name, oh yeah, the Shinnecocks.

Jesus H. Christ -- I am trying to keep this here family-oriented, but who the hell gave that tribe a name like that? I don't want to say nothing and get myself further in deep doo-doo, but damn, ya's got to wonder sometimes, I'm telling you.

10:04 AM, June 06, 2006  
Blogger JLou said...

I wish I could be there pounding the pavement with everyone else, but I have to content myself with cheering on the candidates from the other coast. Good luck to everyone!

10:19 AM, June 06, 2006  
Anonymous Rocky Balboa said...

Yo Mr VPO.

Rocky here. You ain't claimin dat Big Dick and Little Dick are in favor of Shiny-cocks are you?

Den dere's dat Dick Armey guy and duh udder one named Boner, whose also in cahoots with dese guys, and if youse ask Rocky I tink dey all go back to Dick Nixon and dis is all a big friggin conspiracy of DickHeads. Dey've joined up wit duh ButttHeads, and now dey are all dirty dicks if you know what I mean.

Apollo told me wunce to "Dick Nixon before he dicks you" and I gotta confess I hadta tink about dat one fer a bit before I got it, but den I had a good friggin laugh.

In light of dis whole friggin procession of Dirty Dicks, an Armey of 'em fer Chrisssake, maybe we could re-woid dat to say "Dick the Dicks before dey Dick you." But den I gots to tinkin dat dese guys ain't got no friggin dicks at all. I mean did you ever hear Pombo the Pigeon sing? He sounds like he got his cojones cut off at birth, like a friggin 5 year old Michael Jackson wearing stillettos.

No wonder he suffers so much friggin psychological trama and feels like he gotta go around rapin and pillagin duh planet. You know what I mean?

Rocky out.

10:26 AM, June 06, 2006  
Anonymous Vicki said...

Maybe it's because it's election day. Maybe it's just that I needed a good release of tension. Maybe ya'll just had to get some of this stuff off your chest, but you've made my day.

Ok...well....Jerry winning today would actually REALLY make my day, but this was a good bright spot in an otherwise tenseful day. (Is tenseful a word?? If not, it should be)

Keep up the good work and words. Humor is a great way of keeping people informed.

Rocky, you rock
VPO, Thanks for all you've given this blot.

Vicki Out

10:34 AM, June 06, 2006  
Anonymous Rocky Balboa said...

Yo Vicki.

Rocky here. Is you duh famous Vicki duh Chicki dats been my guy McNoiney's best supportin actress?

Rocky love you honey, but hey don't take dat duh wrong way cuz Rocky still love both Adrian who came wit a friggin turtle and even Paulie, who ain't so bad to have around as long as youse keep him supplied wit a steady diet of BeanOs. You know what I mean?

Rocky gotta pretty good life here in Stock-town, but to tell you duh truth me and Adrian's always worried dat duh friggin levees are gonna break sumday and we's gonna get flooded. And we ain't gonna blame it on sum beetle, we gonna blame it on sum Dumbass Pigeon - ButtaPombO in Portu-geese.

Speakin of duh stilletto-wearin ButtaPombO, he's still chirpin his one-note testyrone-less songs, like duh Fool on duh Hills, but to Rocky its ButtaPombO whose duh fool and not just on one hill but two. He's the Fool on Capitol Hill and duh Fool in duh Tracy Hills, but he's still gettin rich on our dough while Rich PAC is gettin richer on Jack-off's dough and pretty soon he's gonna have more dough den Richie Rich's PAC if youse know what I mean.

But anyways, Rocky tank you Ms Vicki fer all you done cuz you done a great job fer my guy McNoiney. In winnin we need to show dese Filson guys - especially Rickey - the kind of class dey didn't show us and welcome dem with open arms. And if by chance it should go duh udder way, well den hopefully you'll judge Pretty Boy by Mr cf and Pretty Goil and not by Rickey and Gibby Boy duh Ranter and Raver. Cuz he shure got a loose screw in his noggin too, you know what I mean? Too much whinin and spittin, if you ask me.

I mean it'll be time fer all us to join up wit whatever Dem makes it out alive today outta respect fer takin down ButtaPombO. I mean Rocky gonna do dat, and so is Adrian. You know what I'm sayin? Yo Rickey and Gibby Boy! You wit me us on dis or you gonna arrrgh-you wit me? Laugh at yerselfs wunce in a while fer Chrissake, ya friggin morons!

Butt on duh udder hand, its now time to get serious and unite as Dems and knock off duh real Fool from duh friggin Hills. In Round 2.Roc

Rocky out.

12:22 PM, June 06, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

12:24 PM, June 06, 2006  
Anonymous Nicholas said...


Its been fun y'all. Good luck to all the teams...Starting tomorrow we will all be one big ole team against Pombo.


12:35 PM, June 06, 2006  
Anonymous Rocky Balboa said...

Yo Pretty Goil.

Rocky here again on account dat Adrian went off today to tattle on sum doilies wit her friends and I ain't got nuttin else to do butt hang out on dis here blot where all duh butts seem to hang out wit their butt's all hangin out. Except fer you and yers dat is. Unless YOU is duh blotter hangin out on duh instanet in MissesCheezits in YER underwear and the Repugs are spyin on you - Jeezus!

Butt seriously, Rocky wanna say dat on account of you and Mr cf and Jenny I wuz able to finally conclude dat Pretty Boy can't be all bad. I made a honest missteak in judging him on duh basis of Rickey, whose sort of a Dick in a way, but not like the Repuglican Dicks as it toins out. I mean look at dese BBBs who're now tryin to soak up duh knowledge from dis blot - dey make Rickey look friggin brilliant don't dey? Yo Rickey - you lookin pretty good so keep laughin at yerself OK cuz we shure are! You know what I mean?

Anyways, Rocky out. Yer OK in Rocky's book, and so is Filson. I'm wit him all duh way if he comes out on top in dis horse's ass race.

12:42 PM, June 06, 2006  
Anonymous Rocky Balboa said...

Yo Nick!

Rocky here. Good to hear from you buddy on account dat you is one of duh positive ones in dis here landscape of whiners and complainers and you also yoused yer real name from duh get up and go.

Rocky out. Good luck to you buddy - you is fer McNoiney too right? Or do you tink like Rickey dat McNoiney too left?

12:55 PM, June 06, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i am dying for some news on exit polls - hear anything??

1:18 PM, June 06, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Um this isn't the Presidential Race, let alone the Governors race. Duh!

1:25 PM, June 06, 2006  
Anonymous Rocky Balboa said...

Yo Anonymussesses,

Rocky here. Youse friggin Repugs sure is dumB. If youse can't find the friggin exit from duh polls you could always ask sumone. Or go back out duh same way you came in if you'd get lost udderwise.

I mean Jeezus how much dumBBBer can youse three muskrats wit ears get? And yep, dat's dumB wit THREE Capitol Bs, cuz youse shure are.

Rocky out. Time for BeanO. Heh heh heh.

1:37 PM, June 06, 2006  
Anonymous Vicki said...

One and the same, honest to goodness, real name and all, Vicki, who's been supporting Jerry since just after the primary in 2004. Even helped him with his recount and everything, then came on as volunteer staff for several months this time, just to get the pump primed.

Now, today, we're humming along nicely, with volunteers in and out all day, doin the GOTV thang and hoping that the people in the district do the right thing and elect the person who has the right stuff to not only beat Pombo, but actually solve some problems that this country has.

Anyone want to join our victory party, we'll be at Main Street Brewery in Pleasanton. We might not know for sure about the victory, but we'll be celebrating a great campaign anyway.

Best to all

3:49 PM, June 06, 2006  
Anonymous JohnMac said...

I'm sitting here in Connecticut, hoping my brother wins, I'll be up late since it'll be 11:pm here before the polls close, and Jerry tells me that even so it might be tomorrow before results are definitive. However it goes, I'll be voting for Ned Lamont over here, as well as trying to put Rob Simmons (R-CT02) in the unemployment line.

Keep on keepin' on!

3:53 PM, June 06, 2006  
Anonymous jbmendel said...

Howdy folks. I love the spirit I'm reading here today. If we keep this up, getting a big group hug together after the Primary won't be as tough as I thought it would be.

For what it's worth, I'm in pounding pavement in Brentwood today and the only candidate who had any sort of visible presence before I got here was McCloskey.

The turnout thus far has been tiny. I'm looking at precincts with as few as 7 votes in the Dem Primary and others with as few as 2 in the Rep Primary (as of about 3 PM).

Long day and a long night ahead. I'll see ya'll tomorrow.

4:15 PM, June 06, 2006  
Anonymous Rocky Balboa said...

Yo Johnnymac.

Rocky here. So you is McNoiney's brudder? Butt dat would make you Irish too, right? Which would make you a mc not a mac, unless maybe you meant yer yousin a mac insted of a friggin PC but in dat case my condoleezas cuz duh new Rocky video game cum out in PC versions only.

Ain't it like pretty late over dere on duh east coast? Maybe even YOU is duh one sittin around in YER underwear like Wayne Johnson sez, and it ain't Pretty Goil after all, and like Wayne despite all his friggin repuglicanspies everywhere still don't know where duh hell Connettiquette stops and MissesCheezits kicks in cuz dat requires anal-lysis. And if he lysed his anuses, he wouldn't have a Can-didate. Food fer thought anyways.

Rocky in, den out, den in den out, and in and out. Cuz duh music's allright. Who's on foist. Dats a statement dis time and not a question, if you follow my drift.

4:52 PM, June 06, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yo Rocky....

do you ever shut up?

you must have way too much time on your hands...

Maybe you should be helping the cause and get out there and help our boy mccloskey!!!

6:14 PM, June 06, 2006  
Anonymous Nicholas said...

great...a final chance for an "anon" poster to ruin our fun.


6:43 PM, June 06, 2006  
Anonymous Republican Spy said...

yea Anon. Shut up! Here we are with Dicks and Johnsons, Shin an cock's, jlou wanting to be there to "pound the pavement.....

but the mailn thing is we all havd the same priority tonight.....
One big Cocktail!

7:00 PM, June 06, 2006  
Anonymous mariposa said...

Doesn't matter where you read posts: north south east or west.

The Republican trolls are always the least articulate, most specious and ALWAYS the sigularly most ready to brandish the male member.

From WA state to CA: Here's to anybody by Sz. Pombo.

I got a $$ coming to the non Pombo winner. Keep the homefires burning!

7:21 PM, June 06, 2006  
Blogger Dan Spomer said...

McCloskey wins. I got ten bucks sez so.

Is that confident enough?

7:27 PM, June 06, 2006  

Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home